This song is terrible: I'm a little burnt out on the setting of quirky and/or willfully inappropriate texts in general, but I'm willing to forgive a lot on aesthetic grounds. Rock Cookie Bottom man, you get no mercy. BUT. He did draw my attention to this text, which is utterly insane. They define the ban on inflicting "pain and suffering" to mean that inflicting suffering is okay, as long as it's not accompanied by pain. But for that to make sense, the converse would also have to be true—that pain is okay, as long as it's not accompanied by suffering—which would mean what exactly? What's pain minus suffering? Is that when there are safewords? How are these people still practicing and teaching law? And what can I do, as an ordinary American, within the bounds of the law, to cause them personal harm?